I’ve been listening to Katy Perry’s new song, Roar, a lot lately… I know, it’s silly, but I can’t deny that I like the song and more than this, I relate to it. The song is about changing yourself for someone else, about holding your feelings inside but now she had enough and you will hear her roar louder than a lion.
Who can’t relate to this? Sometimes in life, we step back and swallow words, feelings and tears in order to avoid fights and disagreements. This seems to be something sensible to do but it’s also something that hurts you deep inside. Why do we do this? Is that because we are afraid to lose what’s in front of us or is it because we don’t know who we are anymore?
Well, one lead to the other don’t you think? It’s hard to find the right balance… the balance of knowing when to shut up and when to stand up for yourself and your beliefs. I was so worried of not being perceived as a bitch that I ended up losing my voice and little by little, I also forgot who I was.
I’m usually very proud of myself. I always stood up for my beliefs and have never been afraid to speak up… It’s hard to confess that I let someone else control me. Many times I swallowed my words in name of “peace” and also when the answer to my questions was a bunch of rude and loud words. When is it ever ok to disrespect someone you love? When is it ever ok to treat who you love like shit? You get hurt, you cry, you tell yourself that this is unacceptable but you also think about the good things about this person and you then let it go.
I strongly believe that people only do to you what you allow them to do. If someone shouts at you and you don’t say anything, this person will continue to shout at you until you reach your limit and shout it back – louder! This is the moment that you get true to yourself again… The moment that you really can’t take it anymore and you roar. Your roar is so loud that even you can’t recognize yourself.
This is your moment of freedom. This is the moment that you leave the quiet/behaved person behind and fill your lungs with air! It’s so easy to be taken for granted, to get lost, quiet and obfuscated in life and in a way, we might need to go through this to understand what we are really made of. The important thing is to know when to bounce back, when to listen to that voice inside of your head and when to make the right move.
We all need time alone with ourselves to get back together to our old self and learn all over again the things we like and the things we don’t. Who we are and who we don’t want to be anymore. I got back to my old self and I’ve never been happier.
I learned to hear my voice and to stand up for myself once again. I learned that cry in silence won’t help anyone. I learned that taking care of who you love also includes taking care of yourself in the first place. I learned that you only let people control yourself once. I learned that when I roar I’m alive!